As normal as… What!


“The idea behind this photo was totally different, but I still think this describes the child’s mind about depressed mom/parent well. -Mom isn’t so cheerful and all glitter now!” http://www.bcdecomic.com/comics/2576836/on-mothers-day-pt-1/

I subscribe this one magazine focused to families “Meidän perhe”(11/2019) and came across with a great article about depression in family setting. What effects it has to the family and beyond as well as how to deal with it.

What was surprising and new to me was the fact how to broach the child with the information about mom or dad’s illness. Very direct broach was the best way to go with, sure have to keep in mind the child age, but still very open and approving way to discuss about it turns out to be suiting for everyone. At least Anu Puukka psychologist and family therapist suggested in the article. (Meidän perhe 11/2019)

I guess one of the reasons to be honest about depression in the family is that once the child starts to visit his/hers friends houses, they will see different kind of families and surroundings. They start to compare their own experience with others and make realizations which is “normal” and which isn’t. But now that the situation with parent has been open as well as opened up to the child and others in the family, it will be easier to cope at friends’ houses.

Puukka also mentioned that the parent’s behavior might be different versus friend’s parent’s, so it should be very out in the open the depression at home for the child to understand that my mom or dad is sick and not their own self.

After reading about depression in the family. I now understand why it was so important for one of my friends to let our small circle of friends to know about depression in her family. In order for us friends to understand bit better why the other parent is sleeping and doing their own things, although their child is playing and wanting attention from the parent who is not giving it to them.

But now comes the part where I argue the “family and beyond” aspect. I puzzle with the fact dose a person tell to make depression visible or wishing for some support and help to their family. As in the article it stated that the closest friends to you and to your child should be included as much as it is possible to your child’s life, so that the child doesn’t start to keep the illness as a secret or embarrassment. 

Even thought the person in the family with depression is in care, I highly think and recommend that rest of the family members get outside professional support as well. Spouse knows about the depression, but it’s a whole other thing to understand it. This is just what I have seen and heard.

Do you think that the open way and direct broach is the best way to handle visibility of depression in the families and beyond? Or have you seen, done or heard different methods to deal in these situations?

Reference:

Järvinen.V. 11/2019. Meidän perhe-lehti

Yksi kommentti artikkeliin ”As normal as… What!

  1. Elisa Korhonen

    Thank you for this post! I think your chosen topic is important, but unfortunately, it seems to have a stigma around it. Widely, I think depression is a “chronic disease” among Finns. Raising awareness about this topic must be done in order that disgrace and prejudices can be dissipated.

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